Showing posts with label comedy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label comedy. Show all posts

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Have You Seen Me?

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MISSING: Doug’s Wife

She has been missing for a very long time. She disappeared during the height of Doug’s social life, and has been missing ever since. The circumstances of her disappearance are still unclear.

She is described as intelligent and witty, appreciative of Doug’s dry and quirky sense of humor. She is very loving of both Doug and their children, more than capable of reciprocating his devotion. She is also deeply spiritual and devoted to her faith.

She is also described as easy going and easy to talk to. Attractive, but not obsessed by her looks. She is also unusually understanding of Doug’s sometimes immature behavior, while being willing to offer correction and be helpful in encouraging his intellectual and emotional growth.

A devoted husband, when asked what he misses most about his wife, Doug responded that he misses having someone who he can talk to about anything, and having someone to spoil. She has been the light and center of his life, and he has cherished every second of her company. His life has been hollow since she disappeared.

She may be found at or near the How-To section of the local library. Like Doug, she is also passionate about learning and improving her talents. Self-improvement and encouraging their children’s education are some of the most important parts of their lives.

She is believed to be between 25 and 40 years old, and between 5'0" and 5'6".  Due to the extended duration of her absence, he is unable to recall her exact age and height.

If you have any information as to her whereabouts, please contact Doug directly.

Monday, December 13, 2010

The 39 Days of Christmas

In case you missed it, here are the gifts for the 39 days of Christmas…

39 Fops a-fopping
38 Fishwives hawking
37 Coopers cooping
36 Bootblacks buffing
35 Buskers busking
34 Something something
33 Alchemists transmuting
32 Dutchmen plotting
31 Doctors leeching
30 Year average life span
29 Smiths a-forging
28 Coopers cooping
27 Eelers eeling
26 Anarchists bombing
25 Swamis foreseeing
24 Sideburns curling
23 Monks a-changing
22 Rats a-plaguing
21 Coxswains calling
20 Flautists fluting
19 Footmen bowing
18 Gungas dinning
17 Seventy six
16 Midwives birthing
15 Aliens alienating
14 Jacks a-ripping
13 Scriveners scrivening
And so on…

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