Ban Dihydrogen Monoxide!

The Invisible Killer

Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted thousands of people every year. Most of these deaths are caused by accidental inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide do not end there. Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage.

Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating and urination, and possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body electrolyte imbalance. For those who have become dependent, DHMO withdrawal means certain death.

Dihydrogen monoxide:

• …is also known as hydroxyl acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
• …contributes to the "greenhouse effect."
• …may cause severe burns.
• …contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
• …accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
• …may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
• …has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.

Contamination Is Reaching Epidemic Proportions!

Quantities of dihydrogen monoxide have been found in almost every stream, lake, and reservoir in America today. But the pollution is global, and the contaminant has even been found in Antarctic ice. DHMO has caused millions of dollars of property damage throughout the world.

Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:

• …as an industrial solvent and coolant.
• …in nuclear power plants.
• …in the production of styrofoam.
• …as a fire retardant.
• …in many forms of cruel animal research.
• …in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains contaminated by this chemical.
• …as an additive in certain "junk-foods" and other food products.

Companies dump waste DHMO into rivers and the ocean, and nothing can be done to stop them because this practice is still legal. The impact on wildlife is extreme, and we cannot afford to ignore it any longer!

The Horror Must Be Stopped!

The American government has refused to ban the production, distribution, or use of this damaging chemical due to its "importance to the economic health of this nation." In fact, the navy and other military organizations are conducting experiments with DHMO, and designing multi-billion dollar devices to control and utilize it during warfare situations. Hundreds of military research facilities receive tons of it through a highly sophisticated underground distribution network. Many store large quantities for later use.

It's Not Too Late!

Act NOW to prevent further contamination. Find out more about this dangerous chemical. What you don't know can hurt you and others throughout the world.  Write to your Senator and Congressman to express your outrage that this dangerous chemical is still legal!

Oh, the Hilarity

A few weeks ago I posted a link to a video created by Microsoft for their SongSmith product on my facebook account.  The cheesiness is delicious.  If you missed it, here it is:

The idea is that the software will create the backing music for a song that you make up by singing it. 

Some clever individuals have taken the vocal parts of some classic songs and run them through SongSmith to come up with some rather amusing results…

Roxanne by The Police

Hotel California by The Eagles

Eye of the Tiger by Survivor

White Wedding by Billy Idol

Creep by Radiohead

Beat It by Michael Jackson

And finally, Never Gonna Give You Up by Rick Astley

Of course, this is becoming a very popular thing to do, so a search on YouTube for SongSmith yields tons of results.  Have fun!

Gotta Love Advertising…

You may have seen these commercials for Guitar Hero: World Tour on television… they have been playing relatively frequently for some time now.

These make me laugh. Not only did they select a song for the commercials that doesn’t appear in the game, they also selected a song that doesn’t even have any guitars in it (at least not the portions of the song they used anyway). I know they were doing a parody of a scene from Risky Business, but maybe they should have saved this idea for Piano Hero instead?

Convenience

I have to laugh a little bit inside whenever I see the word “convenience” used somewhere these days. Or maybe cry. It seems that some people using it seem to misunderstand its intended definition.

For example, in two of the Little Caesars stores running our POS software, they don’t accept credit cards for payment. Instead they accept debit cards. A sign listed on their window, another on the counter, and yet another on each register says, “For your convenience there is a $1.50 fee for debit card transactions.” I’d like to know in what universe it would be convenient for me to pay an extra $1.50 for a service offered for free just about everywhere else.

Another example at a bank… “For your convenience we will be closed on Columbus Day.” That isn’t the least bit convenient for me; in fact it is quite the opposite; it is a wasted trip if someone doesn’t know it is closed, and forces them to come back another day.

What’s next? “For your convenience we will be performing a full frontal lobotomy on you when you go to bed tonight.”

The other kicker is from web sites that sell tickets to various events, like movies and concerts. There is a “convenience fee.” What is that about? They’re charging us more money because it is more convenient for both them and me? What kind of screwed up logic is that?

In conclusion (as if this is a formal paper, heheheh) whenever the word “convenient” shows up anywhere now it sets off alarm bells. Unless the word has been redefined as “another way to empty your bank account” without informing either myself or the fine folks at Merriam-Webster. To those that have redefined this word in this way, here’s another word for you: bogus.

P.S. Reminder: Movie night featuring Iron Man is tonight at 8:30pm.

Irony

I had a company that specializes in helping people get out of debt place an order for my FileBack PC software a few minutes ago. When I tried to run the credit card it was declined. The reason it was declined? It was over the credit limit.

Caution for Internet Users

A warning for all users of the internet...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrQUWUfmR_I

Oh, the irony...

As I was catching up on my news this morning, the following appeared on the web site I was reading. It's a case of poor juxtaposition of page elements... shame on the site designer!

If you can't tell, that's Miley Cyrus (Hannah Montana) in that picture. Yes, we must save those in the most need. Those suffering extreme poverty, such as Ms. Cyrus. She only has millions of dollars.. she needs your help. Please, give all that you can. Then give a little bit more. Multi-millionaires are starving all over the world. Please help!

Kitty!!!

If I ever get a baby cat, I'm gonna name it Caboodle. Cause then I can say I have the whole kitten Caboodle.

Adobe Tech Support

My copy of Photoshop on my main computer asked to be reactivated tonight, and the Internet activation failed, so I had to call Adobe's telephone activation line, (telephone activation, of course, also failed), so they transferred me to a customer service representative.

I could tell the guy was just reading a script, but I let him walk me through the troubleshooting steps, answering his questions, etc., pretending to be a clueless user. We walked through everything his computer told him to, and none of it worked so he put me on hold while he talked to a level 2 technician. Their conclusion of what my problem was? That I have USB ports on my computer. He wanted me to remove my USB ports in order to use Photoshop. He was very adamant and specific that it was my USB ports, not a device plugged into my USB ports.

Anyway, after explaining to him that I can't remove my USB ports he went ahead and gave me the reactivation code, and it worked. But oh my gosh… Remove the USB ports… That's really a new one.

If I was thinking a little more clearly I should have asked him the best way to do it. Should I use a hammer and chisel? Or is a jigsaw a better way to go? Perhaps chewing them off of the motherboard… or a little C4 smashed into the ports would take care of it. But what if none of those methods are quite precise enough? Maybe I should use an angle grinder instead, or rent a laser cutter, so I only have to remove that one part of the motherboard. After all, we wouldn't want to damage any of the motherboard's other components; we're only trying to remove the USB ports. What is the next step if I can't get Photoshop to load after removing my USB ports? And after the USB ports are gone, where do I plug in my mouse? Should I whack off the plug and duct tape it directly to my video card? After all, the mouse pointer shows up on screen, so it must be connected to the video card, right? The USB port is there only for convenience so I don't have to open up my computer to plug in my mouse. There's really no need to have a USB port getting in the way, preventing me from using Photoshop or any other Adobe software for that matter, they're just trouble. And when I want to copy pictures from my digital camera to my hard drive, I'll just epoxy that cable there. Let's just bypass the problem altogether, shall we?